a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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