Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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