Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
