Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
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