So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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