Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
