How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
