I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
