Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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