Yo dont text me then not text me
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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