I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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