my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
