dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
