people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
