I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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