I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
