dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
