Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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