Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
