You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
