READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
