my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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