Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Sext me about skeletons
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
