She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
