Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
