just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize