I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
