Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
We need a shit load of segways right now
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
