Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
