If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
