i jhust puked up my retainher.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Shitshow foam night was such a success
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
