Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
We talked him into tasing himself.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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