I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
