My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
