So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Randomize