I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
now i know why i became what i already was.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
