Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
My feet surprised me
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
