no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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