You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
