Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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