Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Life is so much better after having sex.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
