"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I'm so fucking centered right now
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
