sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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