found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
