I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Randomize
