but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
