I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Randomize
