It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
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