Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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