a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
and she was petting her beer can
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize
