You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Randomize
